Am I right?
That is the theme of my life right now. I've talked about it before, but lately I've been feeling burnt out from tracking. From watching what I eat. From doing Weight Watchers. It's not like I'm not seeing success, but I just feel tired. I walk by people at work eating their muffins and their pasteries on Breakfast Thursdays and wish I could do it to (And I know you can, but the points aren't worth it to me) and not care what I'm consuming.
Ok I don't wish that. I'm happier now than I've ever been, I just hit a wall, so to speak. You do anything for a really long time, eventually you are going to get tired of it, you know? I don't care who you are and how much success you've had on weight watchers. Eventually, it gets hard. And annoying. And you sometimes just think to yourself "I just want to devour a burger" without abandon. Or drink myself silly without thinking about the points plus damage.
So I took my vacation, and vowed not to think about Points Plus. At all. I was going to enjoy myself and have a good time. And take a break from it all. And it was great.
Seriously people. Great. I have so many victories to share (and some bad things too, but I'll share those as well. Full disclosure, right?)
-I can honestly say that at every meal I stopped myself when I was full. That includes not finishing my fries at the fish and chips place, ordering a small burger from mcdonalds (hey, sometimes you need it) and bringing home the pizza from Flatbread Pizza Co.
-We walked everywhere! The first night we walked the mile and half into downtown Portland. Then we walked from bar to bar. Saturday we walked around downtown. Especially Saturday night. We went to bars clear across town, and even though it was raining, we still trecked it out. Sunday was our big day. We went to a Wildlife park, and it all spread out. In addition to being a blast, it felt like a great workout afterwards!
-M and I did not drunk eat once. We wanted to, a bit. The second night we even bought snacks so we could do it healthy style. But we resisted, and I'm proud of us for that!
Not so Victorious:
-I drank. A lot. I also threw up the second night from drinking, which I haven't done in almost 8 months. Yikes Marie, Yikes. We partied a bit too hard. Next time we go away we both agreed we don't want to be hungover both days :-)
-I may have snacked a lot Saturday afternoon. Hey, I was hungry!! And on Vacation! :-)
We had such good food while we were there though. Awesome Jappanese, great pizza, great Fish and Chips, amazing Belgian style french fries. I was in foodie heaven!
All in all a good trip. I did overindulge drink style Saturday night, but things happen, right? It could have been worse, and as of right now I'm only up 2 pounds, which I'm okay with.
I've realized a lot of my happiness is based off the scale, which isn't fair. So much of my success is based on what isn't in those numbers. Personal Happiness, Athletic ability, loss of inches. How can I achieve all that and still not lose weight some weeks? And then proceed to beat myself up over it. I need to relax on the scale for awhile. I'm still going to weigh in, but I'm not going to make it my life. If I hit what I want to hit, great. If I don't then I'll just have to do better this week. It's a journey, and I can't live my life constantly restricting myself. There is a line between indulging all the time and just living my life. It's totally doable, I just need to work on my self restraint, and figuring out what's truly important to me.
I do have to update on my race, I'll do that another time though. It's going to be a long one :-)